jeremiad definition

Constant Complaints About Well-Meaning Friends

I tuned out her jeremiad while spooning liquid chocolate. Swinging the utensil over a bowl of popcorn, satisfying dark drizzles covered the fluffy treat. A handful of crushed peppermint made the mixture drool-worthy.

“Are you listening?”

“Absolutely,” I said while sneaking a taste. Oof, Trevor and Renee couldn’t come soon enough. Cooled popcorn was never as good.

“William.” I lifted my eye to my red-faced sister, her posture quirked awkwardly. “Stop obsessing over your popcorn and listen to my rant.”

I set the clear bowl aside and reached for the bags of candy. “That doesn’t require my input.”

Wendy’s nose scrunched, fires blazing in her eyes. “A comment would be nice. ‘You’re not crazy.’ ‘You’re super fun.’

“Mom said lying’s wrong.” I snickered at my joke, hard candy rattling into the small ceramic dish. Popping one in my mouth, I shifted to the next snack. “Relax, you’re overthinking this.”

“Am not. They absolutely hate the game and don’t appreciate the time and effort I’ve put in.”

“Then why do they keep coming back?”

“Because of you.” Her scowl deepened, cheeks redder than her dyed hair. “You all chuckle together and undermine my hard work. You think it’s easy writing a roleplay quest that only takes a month.”

“It’s already been two.”

“Exactly!” She resumed her pacing as she continued, “We’ve barely made it past the first challenge and now they’re bored. They hate the game, hate my writing. Hate me.”

I grabbed the counter, thankful my hand hadn’t smacked the trail mix off. “That’s a little much.”

“Is it?” She hugged her shoulders, skin tone evening with the parting of her brow. “They ignore my messages, don’t open my emails. I’m being ghosted.”

Organizing the bowls, I said, “You do realize they have lives. Renee works almost all day and Trevor has a girlfriend.”

“I hate her.”

“Because she isn’t you.” Gaining the disgusted sneer that joke always garnered, I leaned on the counter. “Wendy, the world doesn’t revolve around you. Not even in your fictional carnival. Sometimes people are busy because they’re living life, not because they’re ghosting you.”

Face contorting in that odd forced acceptance their father despised, her jaw worked up a response. Instead of words, she grabbed a handful of popcorn and stuffed her face. “That’s good.” She snatched the bowl and set it on the table before crunching on another handful.

A knock rattled the door.

Leaving the feast of goodies, I let Trevor in.

“Renee’s behind me,” he said, sweat glistening on his skin while he shouldered a bag. “Can I use your shower?”

I answered with a gesture to my bedroom, Trevor six-foot frame running in.

Renee ambled through the door, gripping a thick jacket around her body. “How is he wearing shorts?”

“It’s not that cold.”

She glared at me from under her fur hood. “I’m from the south; this is unheard of.” Disrobing her jacket revealed a green sweater that clung to her thick hair. Rubbing her palms, she shuffled close and whispered, “I think I got some emails from Wendy, but they got buried. Anything I need to know?”

I shrugged. “Only thing I’m sure of is she’s in a bad mood.”

“Retail shift or bunnybanger339?”

I shook my head. I didn’t get a chance to speak, Trevor coming out in jeans and a dry-fit hoodie.

He rubbed a towel through his chocolate curls, strands standing on end. Speaking in hushed tones, he said, “Say, I forgot to ask if Wendy messaged the group. I left my phone at the office and haven’t been able to get back in because of the holiday.”

Renee dragged him closer. “She’s mad.”

“Savekillmonger616 or fast-food mishap?”

Tapping both of their arms, I said, “It’s us.”

Trevor quirked his brow. “Why?”

“Because we have lives. Who knows.”

Renee pocketed her hands, eyes flicking around the hall. “She knew we were coming, right?”

I nodded.

“Hey.” Wendy peered into the hall, everything but her gaze friendly. “Game’s in here.”

We all gave her a thumbs-up before returning to the huddle. Squeezing each of their shoulders, I whispered, “You’re not doing anything wrong. It’s something she’s gotta overcome.”

They nodded, though they seemed less optimistic about our current quest. Appeasing the gamemaster.

We sat at the table, rolling the dice and listening to her instructions. Hours passed as we made plays and reviewed the rules, Wendy throwing question over everything we did. I tried to keep the mood light, but Trevor and Renee’s gaze rarely left Wendy’s razor-thin nerves.

My phone binged at nine o’clock, marking the end of the session. We all stood and stretched, legs wobbly from sitting so long.

Wendy cleared her throat, gaining our attention. “I just want to say thank you for coming tonight and continuing to play. It means a lot.”

Renee smirked. “It’s either this or mindlessly scrolling Youtube.”

“Appreciate the invite,” Trevor said, heading toward the door. They grabbed their stuff, promising to check their schedules for another available time.

Once out the door, I turned to Wendy. “See?”

Running her fingers through her cropped hair, she said, “I don’t think they had fun. It was so quiet. And they didn’t understand any of the puzzles. They’re literally so simple.” She continued on and on, another jeremiad ensuing throughout my cleanup. Only her gripes were of the very things she’d desired hours before.

Once everything was clean, I went into my room. I didn’t care if she got offended that I’d left. At least she’d have something worth complaining about.

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Within The Realm

Nolstalgic Movie for Your Thoughts

“How could you not like Arrival? It’s as sci-fi as sci-fi can be.”

Renee shrugged at Trevor’s question, tossing a fresh handful of Skittles into her mouth. “I hate paradoxes. Have Hawkeye blow the ship up and it’s a better movie.”

Returning the DVD case to the shelf, I glanced over my shoulder. “So Empire Strikes Back or Independence Day.”

She nearly fell out of the plastic chair while slapping the small table. “Heck yeah! We should get one of those.”
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Nolstalgic Movie for Your Thoughts

“How could you not like Arrival? It’s as sci-fi as sci-fi can be.”

Renee shrugged at Trevor’s question, tossing a fresh handful of Skittles into her mouth. “I hate paradoxes. Have Hawkeye blow the ship up and it’s a better movie.”

Returning the DVD case to the shelf, I glanced over my shoulder. “So Empire Strikes Back or Independence Day.”

She nearly fell out of the plastic chair while slapping the small table. “Heck yeah! We should get one of those.”

Expensive Appetite for Gratification

She didn’t need an alarm. How could anyone sleep the night before Christmas? Especially when expecting the greatest of gifts. Her brother complained of her gulosity, but what else was the holiday for than asking for the most?

Leaping from her bed and tying a robe around her small frame, Nina escaped her room and ran to the living area. To the sparkling tree surrounded by gift after gift. Large boxes, small bags. The house still slept as she separated out her presents. At this age, dreams of Santa coming down the dirty chimney had faded. Now, she brought her list to the source.

She’d topped the year before, scribbling her want for a laptop, hoverboard, PlayStation, and TV. Her room was ready for the additions, shelves reoriented and desk pushed aside. Excitement bubbled in her chest as she noted the weight and width of each box. It seemed her wishes had been met.

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